What the poor showed me

     "Poor" gave me some kind of inspiration of "Dream", good dream.  Give me the thoughts to "hope" the better world.  The world is full of good life, justice, and good people.   Therefore, I think that I am really stupid to dare ever wish the environment really changed.  However, it seemed that it's only desire, but not the truth.  The dream is never so well, and the world is not followed the justice, too.  To be socialize with people and made rumors among people so that I did not have this kind of ability.   Sometimes, do not take rumors so seriously because it is just a kind of "social skills" for people.  People just like to make some good "events" on the favor of them.  It seemed that I made mistakes like that before because I always pretend that I am smart and good social people.  Actually, I am stupid and  clumsy at social with people, and I never be the winner.  I am loser always.
     Maybe I should make my nickname as "loser" and end with "always".   You have to be social and active, and you have better made more and more friends as possible.  To have more friends, you can have better health and better life, too.   It seemed that people have good reasons to have social with others, and I think that I have some kind of dilemma in "socialization".   That's the rule of the world. 
     It is a very vital skills for people to "survive" in the world, ;but, how could you betray the truth which you even did not like, either?   Sometimes, I think that I would rather sacrifice my socialization if it is a right or more proper conditions.  However, I never thought that I could "bury" so many chances to make friends with them.   Others who see this post should laugh and say that "you are some kind of good joker, actually" (Behind this post, they might blame on me more than 10 times. )
       Maybe even the Mighty think that I have a stomach-and-headach-similar humor that made people feel I am a "problem maker".  However, the problem never really belonged to me but it seemed that became the shadow after me.  The emotional burdens never left nor gave me peaceful life, ever.
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God,
      Please forgive my Chin-glish.   I never thought that I really use the "pattern" of standard.    My English is so poor that everyone laughed at me, but it's only a normal and acceptable behavior.   However, the truth is some kind of core of rapaged issue or the cause for "emotional situation".    I used to read the post about the topic of "brain" (in Trad-Chindese), "how to make your decision", which told me that the human beings used their "emotional brains" to see, hear, or judge things.  The fraud groups are good at useage of the weakness among people.
      Sometime, I just cannot stand strange "dreams" in my shallow sleeps after that 2 families moved here.  I standed it over 5 years, and I think that maybe your kindness can help me to give me a "deep" sleep. 
More deeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep sleep.
                                   Thank you forever.

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What the poor showed me